A random thought has been floating in my head.
I haven’t drank alcohol in over a decade. I am not yet 30.
No, I’m not religions and the older I get the less I identify with the straight edge subculture.
Recently I picked up my phone and found a text from someone who I used to know. The extent of the conversation basically was:
“Hey someone saw you playing horseshoes in your front lawn the other day. Were you drinking?”
To which my response was, “nope”.
“Yeah, I won that bet”
“No shit”
In fact, the only argument I can think of in favor of the consumption of alcohol would be to complete the James Bond-esque allure of a man that can conduct international espionage, fuck your wife, and enjoy a cocktail (preferably at the same time).
Sadly, I have never met anyone who even comes close to this aesthetic in real life. Ever. Rather, I tend to encounter Coors swilling frat boys, microbrew beard-wearing townies and rambling shoeless-whores stumbling home. These people do not provide a convincing argument to start drinking. I probably just attend the wrong parties.
Also, I have been reading this book. I could draw parallels between the main character and myself. Talk about absurd convictions.
earthmovers
To Live In Discontent 
To be honest, it’s *super* helpful to have friends who don’t drink but don’t have a personality that screams “Mormon” to them. This is particularly helpful in this town, where craft beers are the hip thing to do, and there are more events for microbreweries than all other events combined.
To go along with this theme, I also have no idea why people drink so much alcohol that they can no longer function at all. Losing track of how many you’ve had could be understandable, but people do it *on* *purpose*. That’s another thing I can’t ever see the allure in, except for maybe if it’s possible to use it as a valid excuse for why you did something bad (and it’s an excuse no one should ever accept).
“rambling shoeless-whores stumbling home” awesome and cheers.